Excerpts from the book:
An enlightened teacher is not afraid of his anger, because he has learned to express it without doing damage. He has mastered the secret of expressing anger without insult.
Even under provocation, he does not call children abusive names. He does not attack their character or offend their personality. He does not tell them whom they resemble and where they will end up.|
When angry, an enlightened teacher remains real. He describes what he sees, what he feels and what he expects.
An effective teacher does not play the role of a saint or act the part of an angel. He is aware of his human feelings and respects them. Though he cannot always be patient, he is always authentic. His response is genuine. His words fit his feelings. He does not hide his annoyance. He does not pretend to be patient. He does not demonstrate hypocrisy when feeling nasty.
Example of nasty teachers:
A teacher asked a child to make a choice and the child was taking his time in answering. The teacher said, "We don't have all day. Make up your mind, if you have one."
Ginott says: A slow student is not cured by sarcasm. Mental processes are not mended by mockery. Ridicule breeds hate and invites vengeance.
When a child was having a problem with math, the teacher said: "Where were you when I explained the problem? You never listen. You always play. Now you want special attention. You are not the only one here. I can't hold special classes for you." [Six shots in a row]
How parents and teachers talk to children how they feel about them. Their statements affect their self-esteem and self-worth. To a large extent, their language affect their destiny.
Labeling is disabling
Once teachers assimilate the principle of "no labeling," they become more helpful even in difficult moments.
The essence of discipline is finding effective alternatives to punishment.
In discipline whatever generates hate must be avoided, whatever creates self-esteem is to be fostered.